Badjim.com

October 29, 2015

In the News - McGruff

Filed under: Clean, In the News — Bad Jim @ 10:41 am

GALVESTON, Texas - John Morales, the actor who played the crime-fighting cartoon character ‘McGruff the Crime Dog’ was sentenced to 16 years in prison stemming from a 2011 arrest in which police seized 1, 000 marijuana plants, 27 weapons - including a grenade launcher - and 9,000 rounds of ammunition from his home, reports CBS Houston.
The sentence was handed down Thursday, just three days after the 41-year-old former actor pleaded guilty. Morales insisted during the sentencing hearing that he was nonviolent, but U.S. District Judge Vanessa Gilmore said, “Everything I read about you makes you seem like a scary person,” reports the station.
McGruff the Crime Dog is a cartoon bloodhound that was created by global advertising company Saatchi and Saatchi and the Ad Council in the early 1980s for the National Crime Prevention Council. The cartoon figure was used by U.S. police in spreading crime awareness, and is perhaps best known for the tagline “take a bite out of crime.”

October 8, 2015

I’m going to the bar

Filed under: Bad Jim's Pub, Gender Bashing — Bad Jim @ 11:48 am

From Mohamed in Cairo:

A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn’t wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, “Honey, I*ll be right back.”

“Where are you going, Coochy Coo?” asked the wife.

“I’m going to the bar, Pretty Face. I’m going to have a beer.”

The wife replies, “You want a beer, my love?”

She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.

The husband didn’t know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, “Yes, Lollipop…but at the bar…you know…they have frozen glasses… ”

He didn’t get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, “You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?”

She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, “Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d’oeuvres that are really delicious…I won’t be long. I’ll be right back. I promise. OK?”

“You want hors d’oeuvres, Poochie?” She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d’oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and pork strips.”

“But my sweet honey…at the bar….you know there’s swearing, dirty words and all that…”

“You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?…LISTEN UP DICKHEAD! SIT DOWN, SHUT THE FUCK UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG, AND EAT YOUR FUCKIN’ HORS D’OEUVRES. BECAUSE YOU’RE MARRIED ASS ISN’T GOING TO A FUCKIN’ BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER… GOT IT, ASSHOLE?”
…and they lived happily ever after.