An American businessman was in Japan. He hired a local hooker and was going at it all night with her.
She kept screaming “Fujifoo, Fugifoo!!!”, which the guy took to be pleasurable..
The next day, he was golfing with his Japanese counterparts and he got a hole-in-one. Wanting to impress the clients, he said “Fujifoo”.
The Japanese clients looked confused and said “No, you got the right hole.”
An oldie from Whiner Glen who now lives in Georgetown, TX. This place is known as ‘The retirement capitol of Texas’ Sounds like a rockin’ place Whiner! See ya at the Dairy Queen.
Tommy Bolt, toward the end of one of his infamous high-volume, temperamental, club-throwing rounds, asked his caddie for a club recommendation for a shot of about 155 yards.
His caddie said: “I’d say either a 3-iron or a wedge, sir.”
“A 3-iron or a wedge?” asked Bolt. “What kind of stupid choice is that?”
“Those are the only two clubs you have left, sir,” said the caddie.
OK - this will either be Bad Jim’s last Tiger Woods joke or his first Christmas joke of the season. You be the judge!
Injuneer Joe heard this on the Jay Leno Show last night.
What is the difference between Tiger and Santa Claus?
Santa stops after three “ho’s”………..
Compliments of Rigger Robert:
Tiger Woods wasn’t seriously injured in the crash, but he’s still below par.
Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.
Tiger Woods has been dropped by Gillette after admitting that his crash was the closest shave he had ever had.
A movie is being developed base on events, titled “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hydrant”.
EA Sports are releasing new Playstation game… “Tiger Woods 2010, Grand Theft Auto”
What does Tiger Woods have in common with baby seals? They both get clubbed by Norwegians.
After a wayward drive, Tiger Woods found water before nestling behind a tree.
Perhaps Tiger should be using a driver?
Compliments of Wackozacko in Houston:
If the only person that can beat Tiger is a blonde with big breasts, it’s time for Phil Mickelson to bleach his hair.
Why did Tiger crashed into a fire hydrant AND a tree? He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.
Why did Phil Mickelson call Elin yesterday? To pick up some tips on how to beat Tiger.
What is the penalty for getting it in the wrong hole? Ask Tiger, he knows.
Tiger drives very well on the fairway but doesn’t fare very well on the driveway. Rock me.
Whats the difference between a golf ball and a caddy? Tiger can drive a golf ball.
Nike wants to drop their endorsement due to accuracy problems. Apparently, Tiger’s spraying his balls everywhere.
Given Tiger’s racial heritage can we call this a Black Thai affair?
Tiger just changed his name: Cheetah.
What do Tiger and the Beatles have in common? They both experienced a hit with Norwegian Wood.
From John S. over at Hans’ Bierhaus in Houston:
The cops asked Tiger’s wife how many times she hit him with the 9 iron, and she said “I can’t remember, just put me down for an 8.”
From Wackozacko in Houston:
Q: What were Tiger and his wife doing out at 3am?
A: They were out clubbing.
Hugh Jass Eqr. in Houston sent us this one!
Q: What’s the difference between a Cadillac Escalade and a golf ball?
A: Tiger Woods can’t drive an Escalade 300 yards!